• Mer

One Night Stand Me Up...



I've just returned from lunch with a girlfriend, where she told me the best dating story I've heard in my life; we're talking, tears streaming down my face and audible laughter in the middle of a restaurant, good. We all know dating can be pretty awful because, well, people suck and it is hard to find a soulmate through all the bullshit.


“She was sure to confirm with him that driving her to the airport also meant picking her back up in a few days because she wouldn't have a car waiting for her at the airport.”

So imagine this: one year ago, said friend joined Tinder (swipe left, swipe right) to meet singles in her area. After a few long phone conversations with a seemingly great guy, she invited him over to her place for dinner and a movie. He rode his motorcycle over (so hot) and proceeded to lay on her couch while she cooked him bacon and they watched movies together (her words). He stayed the first night, and on the second night, they attended her company Christmas party together. He then stayed another night. Seeing how things were going so well - I mean, obviously he super liked her and bacon because he had literally stayed at her house for THREE FULL DAYS - she asked him for a big favor.


"I'm leaving town this afternoon for a few days. Do you want to give me a ride to the airport? You don't have to, I can just drive myself." Of course this gentleman was willing to drive her to the airport because maybe he didn't have a job or anything else to do after three days of this so he said, "yes." She was sure to confirm with him that driving her to the airport also meant picking her back up in a few days because she wouldn't have a car waiting for her at the airport. He mumbled something like, "yeah, cool," and they loaded up the vehicle and set off into the sunset. She waved goodbye and boarded her plane, thinking she had met a real catch this time.


Upon arrival at her destination, she texted The Catch and told him she had made it safely and would just text him the itinerary for her return flight so he could plan on picking her up then. No return text, but whatever he probably just didn't have a signal. She texted him a few more times over the course of her trip with no response. It was fine. Totally fine. On the day of her return flight, she called and left details on his voicemail before sending one final text before take-off. She was not really worried at that time because he was really sweet and probably going to surprise her at the airport with like a sign and flowers or something cute.


Two hours later, she landed and retrieved her bags before calling him again and heading toward Passenger Pickup. It wasn't until this point that it really set-in; she was stranded at the airport. Also, remember, Dude had brought a motorcycle to her house so he used HER CAR to bring her to the airport. What?! We all have lapses in judgement and he was super cute and had a job (I think) and it seemed TOTALLY FINE. At this point, she's lightheaded and breathing into a bag; praying that she hasn't been robbed blind while on vacation. Completely embarrassed, she finally calls a guy that she knew from work to come get her because she, "didn't think he would judge," her. He did, however, think that he was going to get lucky as payment for the ride because men can be fucking awful, and then he was really pissed when she kicked him out of her house without any sexual reward for his airport rescue. Once she was safely back at home she discovered Mr. Catch had actually returned her car, left everything untouched in her apartment, and locked the door when he left. Seriously. Not a single sign he had even been there or had unbridled access to her home and car and life for four days. And she never heard from him again.


Until last week, when she found a watch in her couch cushion and realized it was his. Lucky for her, she still has his phone number. She texted him, got his address, sent back the watch, and then he told her that he would totally try to "make it up to her" for being a "prick" and leaving her at the airport, except he is, "totally cool with being single right now." I mean, I'm not certain why he is still single a year later, but I'm comforted by his content.

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